Clueless fuckwits!

I was called to have a look at my in-laws house. They moved in a few months ago and the light at the top of the stairs has never been very bright. Also, there has always been a set of mystery switches on the stairs which they couldn’t figure out.

Upon further investigation I found the problem, and fixed it.

It turned out the slave wire to the top of the stairs from the bottom went via the back of an intermediate switch. In the intermediate switch the red and yellow wires were carrying the two lives, whilst the blue was a neutral up to the light.

What the people changing the switch had done is put both the live and the neural through the intermediate, and left the other live in a chocolate block connector. So all the intermediate switch was doing was switching live and neutral around.

Worse still, the neutral was then slaved onto the switched live of the downstairs fitting – so, both sides of the bulb were getting 230V. There was essentially no return feed! This showed because neutral had 230V present at it when it was on downstairs.

I rectified this, and sure enough one set of switches now turns on the upstairs light and one set now works the downstairs light. As a bonus the outside light also now works too – previously it only worked when the hall light was on.

Ironically, two electricians had already looked at this and suggested “major repair works”. Because two wires were in the wrong place.

My in laws now have a bright house and all are happy.

New glasses

It’s that time again. After 2 years I need new glasses. It’s not strictly a need – my prescription hasn’t actually changed at all – but my current Oakleys haven’t fared too well. The frames have bent and twisted through abuse at work, plus I actually really fancied a change.

Over the last few years my frames have got smaller and thinner…

2011 Oakleys
2015 Bench – I wasn’t very well off at this point and had to downscale my glasses from my favourite Oakleys.
2017 – Back on the Oakleys
2019 – Oakley “Gauge” Frameless

And the new reveal?

Well they’re exactly the same frames as my sunglasses!

Oakley Crosslink

In fact, here’s my sunglasses.

Oakley Crosslink – colour coordinated to my latex shirt!

2 Years Gotcha

It’s been over two years since I have myself a kick up the arse and smartened my business up.

The first step was I tidied up my appearance by visiting the Turkish barbers and getting them to shape up and trim my beard and hair.

Weight loss was already ongoing – I didn’t want to become that fat old guy with the belly sticking out from under my t-shirt.

Finally, I took the financial plunge and got a new van. SAF 1 as I call her. I didn’t want to signwrite her so I decided to opt for a personalised numberplate.

Happy 2 years together. One more left before the lease runs out and I replace her. I think it’ll be another Transit Custom.

If Brexit doesn’t fuck the country and we all end up licking moss off rocks. Of course.

We’re gonna lockdown again, aren’t we?

Led by a clueless Government who seem to be using a scattergun approach to COVID-19, and alongside some pretty horrible people who consider that wearing a mask doesn’t apply to them; I am seeing an impending lockdown again.

Manchester locked down again last week. Thursday to be precise. I was supposed to be spending the night working on a music project with one of my band mates, but that didn’t happen. The lockdown prevented me travelling to Manchester, and prohibited me from entering his house. Staying overnight was totally out of the question.

So why do I think we’re going to lockdown?

Well the British “way of life” seems to be an alcohol fuelled tirade of “ladding around”. Normal behaviour for too many people is “going out and getting absolutely mortal”. Not me.

With beer comes removal of inhibitions and a loss of lawfulness. This in turn leads to the lapse of Social Distancing, and the wearing of masks, well that’s just not cricket!

On my way home from work on Friday I drove past 3 pubs; 1 a large chain one, one a micro pub, the other a Free House. All three had packed beer gardens (it was, after all, rather nice on Friday), and all three beer gardens were absolutely rammed with people. None of whom were practicing any form of social distancing.

This happened in Manchester and there was a spike in new infections. Based on the COVID infection timeline I suspect by Friday we will be locked down also.

So, what to do?

Well nothing really. Perhaps enjoy the quieter roads again – after all they have been absolutely ridiculous for the last few weeks.

But as a key worker and an essential worker I can just carry on as normal. Nay, I have to carry on. My job is to ensure fire detection systems work correctly and fire shuttering and smoke ventilation systems also work as they should.

So that’s my rant done. Wait a few days and see if I’m right.


At the request of my physiotherapist I got a 1kg weight. It’s for stretching exercises for my injured lateral epicondyle.

The exercise involves putting my hand holding the weight palm down overhanging the edge of a table and then pulling my hand upwards with my other hand and then letting it drop back down over 30 seconds and resisting gravity. It hurts like hell but pain is good on this occasion.